Rodney Dangerfield, 198. Pleasing everyone, thats impossible. Which affirmation put a smile on your face? P.D. I love my job only when Im on vacation. 39. Hes dreaming too. Short people with an umbrella. 163. Its a door, thats how they work. 68. Why is Monday so far from Friday, and Friday so close to Monday? Dont make me laugh, Im trying to be mad at you. Just like every Monday does on Earth. I dont care! Youre talking to yourself. Live life to the fullest.
18 Funny Positive Affirmations to Get Through Your Shitty Day 116. Here is a list for you that has all the funny affirmations: I am making myself laugh every time I say any sarcastic word. 239. Edward A. Murphy My to-do list doesnt include dealing with negative people. You need some sort of way to offset the inevitable stressors of life, and what better way to do that than with humor? I say what I want and i dont care what everyone else thinks about it. 105. I eat cake because its someones birthday somewhere today. People only rain on my parade because they are jealous of my sun and tired of their shade. 229. Ensure that your actions match your words. First, read the most powerful affirmations below to build a strong mind. 112. [click_to_tweet tweet=I can always think of something funny to say. quote=I can always think of something funny to say. theme=style4], 2023 Oldtown Publishing LLC 479 State Route 17 N Robert A. Heinlein, 243.
Discover funny affirmations 's popular videos | TikTok 140. I tried looking at the bright side of life, but it hurt my eyes. I am happy and joyful. If you have crazy friends you have everything youll ever need. Wake up and smell the birdshit on your windshield., 10. Im lovely because everyone likes me more than Monday morning!, 7. I am at peace with my body and accept it as it is. 1. Does it count if you say them in your mind? 238. A committee is a group that keeps the minutes and loses hours. Flip Wilson, 263. Never ask a starfish for directions. Paul Ehrlich, 241. It will just flow naturally. I dont like morning people, or mornings, or people. The most important thing to remember when using positive affirmations is that it is all about how you feel. If youre hotter than me, then that means Im cooler than you. 161. Life is like a very long TV show, without a remote control. Jackie Collins, 240. If youre hotter than me, then that means Im cooler than you. For beginners who still struggle with letting their voice out, I recommend starting with funny affirmations that will relax you and make you laugh. Im not running away from hard work, Im too lazy to run. 80. Sam Levenson. Sometimes I wish I was an octopus, so I could slap eight people at once. I am transforming into someone who is outgoing and makes others laugh. "We . Charles M. Schulz. Bill Murray. 212. Quotes To Inspire You (MLK), 80 Life Gets Better Quotes To Brighten Your Day (Hope), 50 Bad Luck Quotes When You Feel Ill-Fated. But a little chocolate now and then doesnt hurt. But you're not as old as you're going to be.". They allow you to focus on the positive and what is working in your life rather than dwelling on the negative. 9. Maybe there are no excuses to be lazy, but Im still going to keep looking. 110. Charles M. Schulz Tell the negative committee that meets inside your head to sit down and shut up. - Catherine Pulsifer. 144. Im not lazy, Im just very relaxed. 35. -Katrina Bowden. Roy Lichtenstein. Required fields are marked *. Im amusing and make the people around me happy. can help you become successful in whatever you choose to do in life. I will be the type of person I would like my children to become. In life, sometimes you just need to break the tension with a little humor. Im laughing at the confusion and smiling through the tears. 168. Im still gonna do dumb stuff, only slower., See also: 90 Inspiring & Funny Quotes About Ageing Gracefully, 8. Socrates. Giving up on your goal because of one setback is like slashing your other three tires because you got a flat., 6. Read next: 45 Self-Compassion Affirmations to Practice when Feeling Low. 26. 264. A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing. I am lazier after accomplishing the motive. 75. 204. Because someone is always sitting on the deck. Bill Gates. Common sense is like deodorant, those who need it the most never use it. I am healthy, I am wealthy, I am hot!, 14. - Unknown. Most of the articles that Ive written about affirmations are about more serious topics: Lets keep things a little lighter in this article shall we? Repeat the affirmation as many times as you see fit. It's why you may feel excinervous (aka excited and nervous at the same time). Its a door, thats how they work. By waking up and repeating this mantra, you will set the tone for the day. Relaxing the mind with some funny affirmations is an easy way to reduce stress and keep yourself grounded in moments of turmoil. I dont need validation from others to know Im killing it. 187. I personally love watching masters of comedy captivate audiences with their dark humor and crafty punchlines. 5. Positive mindset affirmations. 5. One of the most important aspects of affirmations is how authentic they feel to you. 156. Sharing quotes, proverbs, and sayings of great authors to touch people's lives to make it better. For the best seat in the house, youll have to move the dog. Once youve chosen one of our affirmations or devised your own, its time to put it into practice. The world is my buffet, and my plate is ready to go. Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. Discover short videos related to funny affirmations on TikTok. I see food, and I eat it. Why did the school kids eat their homework? Remember that the effects of affirmations are no laughing matter, so make sure your voice is heard. I see food, and I eat it. Its not easy staying motivated for work all the time. Sometimes these surprises are way too spectacular and sometimes way too tragic. 64. Cindy from Marzahn.
99 Positive Morning Affirmations You Can Use Daily Enjoy! 164. 3. Im not insulting you. If you want to catch a squirrel just climb a tree and act like a nut. You are good enough, smart enough, beautiful enough, and strong enough. 197. 68. I woke up with some aches and pains, but I woke up. Czech proverb, 261. 62. I enjoy every minute of it. 250. The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits. 3. You wanna know who Im in love with? 21. My six pack is protected by a layer of fat. Give me a photo of you so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas. You deserve it! My goal this weekend is to move, just enough so people dont think Im dead. Alison Boulter Today, I choose to put on my positive pants. Fortunately, theres a way to reap the benefits of these powerful statements by giving them a humorous twist. 1.
100 Funny Christmas Quotes: Short Holiday Sayings - Parade I make a difference by showing up fully. Life is always easier with some humor, smiles, laughter and fun. Lottery: a tax on people who are bad at math. Affirmations to wealth are a great way for you to organize your thoughts and develop a positive outlook. Perhaps youre just starting to use affirmations and still cant take yourself seriously. Im thinking like a proton, always positive., 9. A mind is like a parachute. 58. 1. 171. Be strong, I whispered to my WiFi signal. I breathe in and out. The most important thing to remember when using positive affirmations is that it is all about how you feel. 8. 114. 91. Erma Bombeck. The best way for me to appreciate my job is to imagine myself without one. 244. Remember, no one can make you feel anything other than what YOU allow yourself. Ive been doing nothing for years. People wont be going to bed thinking about that one bad joke you made. Im in desperate need of a 6-month vacation, twice a year. 233. I radiate calmness and tranquility, with a little side of body odor., 4. 175. 167. 189. I dont know how to act my age because Ive never been this old before. 26. What happens to a frogs car when it breaks down? It doesnt work if it is not open. 264. I only check my voicemail to get rid of the annoying little icon. Below youll find a collection of funny affirmations for work that will help you stay motivated and fight the work stress more efficiently. I am intelligent. 14. Yeah, so is a grenade. Ill start this journey with my 10 favorite funny affirmations that never fail to make me laugh. Whatever the case may be, these 15 affirmations will make you feel confident in your sense of humor: Once youre feeling happy and confident about your sense of humor, use these 35 affirmations to navigate challenging situations with a smile. 255. It changes your perception and these short positive affirmations have a way of changing the way you look at yourself and feel more confident.
Short Positive Affirmations - 110 Powerful Affirmations - Mindbless Sincerely, yourself., 2. If I want a squirrel to like me, I guess I gotta act like a nut. You can write them down and use them whenever you're attending a social event or if you simply just want to make yourself laugh. 277. Maybe if we tell people the brain is an app, theyll start using it. 61. Diet rule #1: If nobody sees you eating it, it doesnt contain any calories. 99. Begin your days with these powerful, funny affirmations for self-esteem. I dont need you to remind me of my age at work, I have a bladder that will do that for me., 8. When nothing is going right, go left. Never let a fool kiss you, or a kiss fool you. 1. Henny Youngman, 246. 202. If you enjoyed reading these funny positive affirmations, make sure to bookmark this page for future reference, and share your favorite affirmations with your friends and family. Everybody wants to go to heaven; but nobody wants to die. I choose a lazy person to do a hard job, because a lazy person will find an easy way to do it. No matter what a mess I am, my kids adore me. You may have people laugh at you instead of with you. "Life is like an elevator - Sometimes it stops. Effective pushing often involves poop. You might enjoy: Affirmations: 13 Answers You Should Know 184. Well, I guess I have to be odd to be number one. When our phones fall, we panic; but when our friends fall, we laugh. Seeing a spider in my room isnt scary. Hi! I'm doing great. Funny Friday Quotes. 97. 87. Plus, youre never gonna become funny and charismatic by being afraid to speak your mind. Whats the difference between a guitar and a fish? I dont go crazy, I am crazy. I dont need a hair stylist, my pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning. Waiting until the movie starts to eat your popcorn, hardest thing in the world. I dont worry about getting older. Always follow your heart, but remember to bring your brain along.
If you want your children to listen, try talking softly to someone else. Relaxing the mind with some funny affirmations is an easy way to reduce stress and keep yourself grounded in moments of turmoil. 217. With time, I have started to value more time. Silence is golden, unless you have kids, then silence is just plain suspicious. 246. Friends come and go, but enemies remain and build up. 114. My silence spoke a thousand words, but you never heard them. Im not running away from hard work, Im too lazy to run. 222. - F. 189. I know that I am stupid but when I look around me I feel a lot better. 263. East. What do I do for a living? 15. Cindy from Marzahn Our toaster has two settings: too soon or too late.
60 Short & Funny Motivational Quotes to Laugh About - Wealthy Gorilla The library, because it has so many stories. We are going to be best friends forever, besides you already know too much. Sorry, I didnt pick up my phone, I got carried away dancing to the ringtone. Bill Murray An apple a day keeps anyone a way, if you throw it hard enough. Wilson Mizner, 262. 242. Yesterday I did nothing and today Im finishing what I did yesterday. 2. Making everyone angry, piece of cake. 156. Wake up and smell the birdshit on your windshield. Life gives the test first and then the lesson. Positive affirmations kind of set the way how your day will flow. One thing you need to remember though; if you are going to be funny, then make sure youre actually funny. 162. 2. I havent talked to my wife in three weeks. My cankles will hold me.
Be Funny Positive Affirmations 63. Get Love Tips Sent Straight To Your Inbox. Im not here to judge, Im just pointing out all the mistakes youre making. Remember, What consumes your mind, controls your life., 7. 16. 154. Use this space for describing your block.
39 Positive Affirmations And Inspiring Quotes About Life 261. Please excuse me while I go check the plumbing. "Life is like a roller coaster pic - scary at the moment, funny looking back.". Plus, youre never gonna become funny and charismatic by being afraid to speak your mind. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wifes mother. If youre looking for a way to brighten your day and amp up your attitude, youve come to the right place. Lottery: a tax on people who are bad at math. First, the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. Im full of funny ideas waiting to be expressed. Its alright if you dont agree with me, I cant force you to be right. Life is 10% of what happens to you and 90% of how you react to it. Some people are like clouds. Need to send some positive energy your way? I am loving all the bad experiences because they are giving me something . Friday Affirmations. 231. Breasts dont have eyes. 92. Because they make up everything. Only two more days until Friday.". 26. Lazy people fact #2347827309018287. In the morning, I cant get up. 69. 148. 210. 250. Positive Daily Affirmations for Women. Envelope. We all have baggage, find someone who loves you enough to help you unpack. 279. Cell phones these days keep getting thinner and smarter; people the opposite. 53. 73. Be strong, I whispered to my WiFi signal. Square box, round pizza, triangle slices, now thats confusing. 274.
Short Funny Sayings I breathe in and out. The only power you have is the word no. Franklin Jones, 259. 214. Mental Style Project has been created as an outlet to guide you as you navigate through life, with the right tools and resources that will upgrade your life, enable you to take charge of your personal growth, and improve your wellness journey. Exercise? I now pronounce you man and wife, you may now change your Facebook status. 65. 1. 223. Things are getting better all the time. 33. Life is filled with highs and lows, stress and anxiety, so sometimes some funny and positive words will help you lighten up on an encouraging note. Dear universe, Im totally open to all of the amazing things coming my way., See also: 120 Best Spiritual Universe Quotes To Contemplate Life. I am on a seafood diet. 180. .People who enjoy making other people laugh are also known to be more detail oriented. 227.
Top 75 Funny Daily Affirmations | Committed To Myself 33. 70. Home: Where I can look ugly and not care. 23. 8. My dream job would be the Karma delivery service. Honolulu, its got everything. I stick to things until I get to my destination., 12. Thank God Im an atheist.
Funny Affirmation - Etsy Give me a photo of you so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas. 109. Whenever I clean my closet I take a GPS with me, so I can find my way back. 34. This is a good thing because affirmations are supposed to be associated with happiness and positive emotions. To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer. Silence is golden, unless you have kids, then silence is just plain suspicious. Because so many kings and queens have been reigning there. Share them with your friends and colleagues and make them smile too. God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. Funny Positive Affirmations For Work. My legs are so sore from the gym that I almost couldnt walk to the donut shop. It doesnt work if it is not open. When I was in high school I had two favorite subjects, lunch and recess. Lorrin L. Lee. Whatever the case may be, a sense of humor can go a long way toward changing your perspective on negative occurrences in your life. To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer. Self-love is the greatest middle finger of all time., See also: 210 Killer Self Love Captions For Instagram To Lift You Up. I hope you have a ridiculously amazing day. I am way dumb than my mom keeps blabbering about me to the neighbors aunt.